When David and Randy literally crash into each other things heat up in the grocery store freezer Randy is facing the gauntlet of grocery store aisles and too many options when he crashes into another shopping cart. David can't hide his reaction, recognizing Randy has him short of breath.
Things heat up when the men escape into the store freezer for a little privacy.
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Freezer Burn
Free Range.
Fertilized.
Organic.
Vegetarian.
Free Range Organic.
How many fucking different kinds of eggs were there? Randy started to reach into the cooler filled with the neatly organized cartons for the third time then stopped. He was pretty sure all the different options were stocked on the shelves just to confuse him and every other clueless guy that wanted something yellow to go with his bacon. The chickens were having their subtle revenge. A picture of the foul birds rubbing their feathers together and plotting formed in Randy's mind.
With a groan of defeat, he picked one carton at random and added it to his cart. Visiting the grocery store was not a high point in his week. He’d worked up the motivation to go only after sitting on the toilet next to an empty cardboard roll. He was not a masochist, so only emergency items were written on the paper towel shopping list. Looking down at his messy scribble, he searched out the next item. Bacon, check. Eggs, check. He took a step forward, shopping list in hand. Time to move on to—Bang!
"Umph."
The sound of metal crashing together echoed in Randy's ears as his cart collided with another one coming down the aisle. The force of the collision pushed the handlebar out of his hand and buried the edge in his gut as the cart swung around. He grunted painfully as the air blew out of his lungs, leaving him hunched
over and gasping.
The painful stabbing via shopping cart distracted him. Add that one to the list of lethal weapons. He tuned out the other driver's apologies until he heard his name.
"Oh my God, I am so—Randy?"
Of course, he would recognize that voice. Embarrassment felt like a snake squeezing his chest tight.
Was it too much to ask that he crash into someone he didn't know?
Shit, this could have been a scene from a bad comedy. He could see the script now, being green lighted as ‘Randy, the Bumbling Idiot’. Handsome man turns the corner at the grocery store and runs into another shopper. Queue laugh track.
Randy fought to stop wheezing and respond, but it took a moment to recover his breath. The other man froze like a deer in the headlights, staring at Randy and making the situation even more awkward. He hated looking like a klutz and drawing attention to himself in public.
‚Hello, David.‛ By the time he managed the two words, heat burned his cheeks and he was taken over by stage fright. It was Macbeth in high school all over again. He didn't know his lines.
**END EXCERPT**
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